Gosh darn these newfangled machines and their social networkings.
Is "5-Minute Berenstain Bears Stories" just a collection of the most inane stories about the Berenstain Bears ever?
I feel really discriminated against as a computer nerd. This is frustrating. It's very preachy and judgmental against computers and the people who use them, almost to the point where if you have a job that involves a computer, it can't be worth anything. The main problem with Brother is not that he's looking at soccer gear, but that he's listening to music, horror of horrors, while he's doing his homework. And of course Mama is stereotypically female and bidding on something on "e-Bear." "If you can't get done what you need to do on the Internet in one hour, it's not worth doing." Whatever! Some things are difficult! This is stupid. And lots of homework nowadays actually requires that you go online. They seem to be saying that nothing at all about the Internet is useful. "They all went down to the playground for some good old-fashioned exercise." Because the good old days were better than these newfangled contraptions. And seeing a movie is so much better than being on the Internet. It just is. Because we said so.
Papa buys a computer because he thinks it will help him with his business. Then everybody needs their own computer, even the baby. Sister gets upset because of Pawbook and social issues, because, you know, she's a girl. Somebody insults her and then her friends are saying that they're in love. Brother is playing music while looking at soccer gear instead of doing his homework. Mama is buying things on e-Bear. Apparently she also sells things, though. So she could start her own business, but not if she's limited to the hour a day that they decide on. They decide, "We're spending too much time on the Internet. So we need to have rules. We're only going to be on there one hour a day." "What will we do instead?" "You can get back outside and play like you used to!" And they have so much fun playing outside, that they drag their friends away from their computers to play with them. And Mama makes a quilt! She got so involved that she didn't even bother going online! And after their hour online, they hang out in the family room and apparently stare at the fireplace and read books and knit. And the next day, they go to the movies. The end.
What? You can hang out with your family without limiting your Internet time to an hour a day. It's not okay for the Internet to be a default thing, like watching television usually is? This is silly. If you want to spend more time with your family, spend more time with your family. Don't blame the Internet for it.
The best part, the halfhearted movie titles at the end: "'What will it be?' asked Papa, buying the tickets. 'Pirates of the Bearibbean, Beary Potter, or Spider-Bear?' 'Spider-Bear!' they all agreed. And Spider-Bear it was." The end.